You Are a Comic Collection: Naira Zohrabyan

Member of the 'Prosperous Armenia' faction, Naira Zohrabyan, wrote on her Facebook page:

“To be honest, I don’t like to deal with trivial matters, but I have decided to sue the senior bartender of the 'Tvisaran' restaurant, one Guram Vashakidze-Benklyants. So, this guy has fallen into the political campaign against the Prosperous Armenia Party, and naturally, within the framework of a state order. At this moment, I kindly ask you to pay close attention: he claims that I closed a bill of one million drams at the 'Tvisaran' restaurant during the campaign for the Yerevan city council elections and gave 10,000 drams to young people who were chanting my name. Yes, yes, one million drams for lunch.

Before addressing my legal claim, a little 'splash': Guram, representatives of the government who received state orders, I understand that, for various objective and subjective reasons, your perceptions of women are greatly distorted and the women you know, have seen, or recognized can close bills in restaurants instead of men. Moreover, the women you know can do many other things, but I do not close bills in restaurants instead of men. That’s one. Second, even if we had a break at the aforementioned restaurant with the senior bartender, the figure of one million drams is the most absurd number, because, as far as I remember, and my memory is excellent, during that time we did not hold any army parties or weddings.

Thus, at this point, my lawyers are preparing a civil court lawsuit, and I urge the senior bartender to start gathering the 2 million drams, which I will demand as moral compensation for the two defamatory statements he made: that I closed a bill of one million drams, and that I gave 10,000 drams for chanting his name.

I would also like to mention that I will donate the two million drams to the COVID-19 fund to somehow save the failed fight against the pandemic.

P.S. I should also mention that as a goodwill gesture, I have prepared a gift for this senior bartender – a spelling dictionary of the Armenian language, as he made several spelling and punctuation errors in one sentence. Of course, I do not rule out that he was sent such an illiterate text on purpose, to say, well, what do we have to do with it; it’s the voice of the people. And the ordinary people can write the word 'inspiration' as our dear senior bartender did: 'ոգեվորվացություն' (ogevorvatsutyun). But I have already bought the spelling dictionary. Stay healthy.”